Monday 26 March 2007

U.K.G. recirculated 22nd March 2007

Rudra's father figure, although he would deny it, has gone to his reward. Rudra, the brave coward, feigns indifference. Instead he surfs to

U.G. Krishnamurti, lovingly called UG by his friends and admirers all over the world, is no more. The end came on March 22, 2007 at 2.30 pm in an apartment built for him by his friends Lucia, Anita and Giovanni in their villa in Vallecrosia, Italy. As per UG’s advice, with no rituals or funeral rites, the cremation was carried out the next day at 2.45 pm, in Vallecrosia, Italy. He was eighty-eight years old.

Who was this UG?

What kind of person was he? He was the most enigmatic person you could ever meet – at once kind and cruel, most loving yet stern, constantly talking about money, seeming to ‘extract’ it from friends, yet most generous in giving; seemingly abusive and punishing, yet showering affection on the same person the next moment; utterly carefree, yet worrying about what might happen to the person in front of him; directing people to act in specific ways, yet instantly accepting of any outcome; demonstrating the most incisive logic, yet making utterly contradictory statements. For a man who complained that we are constantly preoccupied with something other than what is happening at the moment, he endlessly talked about himself and his past. One could never fathom UG’s true intentions behind his statements or actions.His answers to our questions came straight like arrows, unsettling our minds. He was well-known for striking down not only the edifices we have so carefully built in our own minds but the foundations of human thought as a whole. UG was truly enigmatic, subversive and revolutionary, and totally fearless.There was a unique energy with UG: in speech or in stillness it was constant and vibrant, and had a profound effect on those who were around him.


Atmospheric pollution is most harmless when compared to the spiritual and religious pollution that have plagued the world.

A messiah is the one who leaves a mess behind him in this world.

Religions have promised roses but you end up with only thorns.

Going to the pub or the temple is exactly the same; it is quick fix.

The body has no independent existence. You are a squatter there.

Gurus play a social role, so do prostitutes.

By using the models of Jesus, Buddha, or Krishna we have destroyed the possibility of nature throwing up unique individuals.

It would be more interesting to learn from children, than try to teach them how to behave, how to live and how to function.

People call me an ‘enlightened man’ -- I detest that term -- they can’t find any other word to describe the way I am functioning. At the same time, I point out that there is no such thing as enlightenment at all. I say that because all my life I’ve searched and wanted to be an enlightened man, and I discovered that there is no such thing as enlightenment at all, and so the question whether a particular person is enlightened or not doesn’t arise. I don’t give a hoot for a sixth-century-BC Buddha, let alone all the other claimants we have in our midst. They are a bunch of exploiters, thriving on the gullibility of the people. There is no power outside of man. Man has created God out of fear. So the problem is fear and not God.

From the Housewife and The Sage l980:

My first interview with U.G. The handsome, smiling, humbly-clad man they called U.G. sat relaxed and friendly before me. Intent upon using my visit to get straight answers, I hurled at him my first question:

"Are there any boots to walk on thorns."
His reply came back crisp and direct, "There are no thorns."
Unsatisfied, I pursued, "The thorns are very much there for me!
"With quiet patience he answered, "Stop looking for roses and there will be no thorns."

The Lion and the Lamb

"the lion will lie down with the lamb, but the lamb won't get much sleep".

'Heel theyself'. Hippocrates dog.

Nice one Jug Jug

Sunday 25 March 2007

Slinky Lad 33/1

There's a grand stretch in the evening.
Rudra skates on thin ice.
He bats on a sticky wicket.

Potty Anonymous

Rudra has reputedly joined a twelve step programme. It requires that new members admit to the above. It proseletises by offering free burgers. Rudra, being an 'American Vegetarian', fell for it.

Saturday 24 March 2007

The Growth of Buddhism (feedback)

From Mrs G.G. of West Cork: "Rudra is an example to none of us" .

From Mrs R.B. of West Cork: "Rudra says wherever I keep leg there will be ants".

From Mr D.S. of Co Cork: (On hearing that Rudra had put his clock forward 25 hours) "May God be amongst her goats for evermore. Praise be to St Rudra, may she continue to deepen the mysterie

From Miss P.D.G of London: (on hearing the same news) "Whereas Ruppee Bear was extremely forward and clocked someone"

From Miss C.G. 0f Wicklow: "Rushka put his clock back 23 hours"

From Guru Des Res: "May all your Mondays be Sundays".

Comment from archivist Didier Defargo (no relation to the world cup skier or personality disorder clinic doctor) 'We are thrilled to hear that Rudra has achieved Sainthood and femininity in some quarters'. We won't pass it on as it might induce a swollen ego. Rudra is quite content with his massive one already. In fact he is proud of it. Rudra always carries ant repellent.'

From Mrs G.G: 'Aunt Repellant'

Friday 23 March 2007

Oscars and Elephants

The World Forum of Religions has announced the Spiritual Oscars. Rudra has been tipped for best supporting evangelist.

A bitchy rival, name supplied, has claimed that "Rudra is a spiritual pygmy, what little he knew has evaporated."

Rudra himself claims that the further he runs away the nearer he gets. The very concept of 'the spiritual' is anathema to him; a construct of man. He sees no such divide. Truth to tell, his world is populated by elephantine thoughts. These dear creatures are noted for their love of family and their rage when in 'must'.

Now, as to dogs, we have it on good authority that Amphetmine Boy, that won a small fortune for Mrs B of Uttoxeter (scroll down to 'introducing the Blessed Bognor Regis') was in fact owned, in camera, by the Grimaldi Racing Stables. Their racing colours blew their cover; red triangles on a white background.

Thursday 22 March 2007

On listening

Rudra has his ear to the ground and his nose to the grindstone (one awkward, the other painful).

On reading these chronicles you may find our subject is unrelable, vascillating, opinionated, fanciful, farcical and out of touch with social reality. You may find that.

He is never stable never the same . He follows moment to moment. Like a bi-polar personality he is "thrilled to the sky, ready to die" . The process is only ever beginning, he tries to hold it yet it slips into concrete, the life evaporates. He especially makes light of experiences that appear 'significant' They are the dangerous ones. To render every moment as equally significant is a bland platitude yet he gave up categorising a minute ago. He remembers Tony Parsons saying to him "This is it" .

Where is Rudra? Where did Prince Reindeer of the Grimaldis go?

What is the most common thing in the world asks Shri Shri Alex:

1. Space

2. Porridge.

3. Now.

4. Other.
Thank you Guru Borat; the most common thing in the world is 'nice, very nice'

The Mistake of Enlightenment

Feedback from our readers Mr. and Mrs. M of West Cork :

Rudra: Enlightenment is not all it's made out to be. (literal
translation: "Finding true enlightenment of the Self was a huge

St Bognor comments: There IS no self to be enlightened.

Rudra (in belligerent form, you don't mess with him): I trust those who wish to take offense to my words are clever
enough to find a reason to do so without me explicitly having to give
them one.

John Trudell: Religious realities are not spiritual. The religious
reality that exists in these technolgic industrial perceptions are
not about responsibility, they're about authoritarianism and guilt
and sin and blame, domination and submission. They're not about
responsibility. Look at the situation and condition that the world is
in and you can tell that they're not about responsibility. They
accumulate wealth, they create their own authoritarian systems, they
use their authoritarian systems and accumulated wealth to influence
economic and political decisions that get made. They use their
resources, they use their authority and accumulated wealth to
influence military decisions that get made. Every behavior they have
is really and truly not about responsibility.

Rudra replies: "Go John Go"

Rudra is a conspiracy theorist.

Savoir et Pouvoir.........

Rudra suggests a more succinct spelling of Tallagh
"Savoir et Pouvoir-to know and to do-are two different things......And we must look everywhere to find what we are looking is in ourselves that we shall find the answer if we know how to listen." Maria Huxley (wife of Aldous)
Rudra smells mischief when he hears the 'we' being overly used. Are you talking about yourself Maria? He sometimes feels liverish if not aldous.
Rudra's countenance is threatening. His ruddy cheeks, spinafex eyebrows and thunderous expression would sicken you, yet he speaks in dulcet tones with the most refined of language, bar the use of expletives. Solicitous in the extreme his rage knows no bounds.
He seeks solace in Petit Point.
Rudra gave away his complete inheritance in a brown paper bag to St Patrick. All he got for his efforts was a gruff " Thanks Big Fella".

Wednesday 21 March 2007

Hospital where the small seat is large

Our Japanese readers sent us their take on Prof. Hilary Bunyon's famous maxim (small stool large hospital). They somewhat laconically comment:

"As for the hospital where the large seat is small; the hospital of the seat of 'no ' is closed."
Go figure!

Tuesday 20 March 2007

Multiple Personality Disorder Clinic, L.A.

Rudra has just checked out from 'The Legion' multiple Disorder Clinic in L.A (above). Whilst there Dr Didier Defargo, 47 (no relation of the archivist on this site or the professional downhill skier) managed to diagnose 'Anticipatory Nostalgia'. He found significance in Rudra's statement that he wanted his nose to be one size smaller so that he could break into the Hollywood A List. An inside source has leaked further revleations . Watch this space.

Monday 19 March 2007

The new (improved?) Rudra

!9th March is significant . Rudra turns over a new leaf today.
As mentioned in the preamble at the head of this blog Rudra is not to be confused with an early form of Shiva.
That Rudra ("Howler") is a rigvedic God of the storm, the hunt, death, nature and the wind.
This one does however have quite some influence over the wind.

Sunday 18 March 2007

Small Stool Large Hospital

From Mr. T.B. of Ballinskelligs:

"There is a sister to Bognor - the very pretty Miss Lyme, and of course the saintly American uncle from N/Y. St. Regis Hotel who - it is assumed - lives under an assumed name.
I'm off to Prague in the morning so will talk to you when I return. Prague - pronounced Pray - Gee in Midleton."

This somewhat enigmatic message came in today. It is an update on his previous intelligence re. 'The Blessed' Bognor Regis who features in many posts below. He remains silent on the other sister Professor Hilary Bunyan (nee Regis). She is a renowned medical judge and may have coined the maxim 'small stool large hospital'.

Archivist Didier Defargo asks 'is the corollary true; large stool small hospital?'
Without wishing to labour the obvious......'no stool hospital closed'

N.B. The Regis family alluded to above has no connection with that of British award winning Olympic athlete John Regis.

Grimaldese Tidbits

Prince Reindeer's mother, Princess Charlotte, took a noted jewel thief known as René the Walking Stick as her lover.

Prince Reindeer's great love of dog's led to an embarrasing financial swindle, in which he lost his shirt, on a scheme to manufacture jewel encrusted collars with the royal insignia ( a pattern of red diamonds on a white background).

Grimaldi Kennels

Rudra was invited to tour the Royal Kennels with his acquaintance Bognor Regis (he of greyhound fame). Bognor was suitably attired with a very fetching Panama hat decorated with red diamonds*.
*The coat of arms of the House of Grimaldi are simply described as fusily argent and gules, i.e., a pattern of red diamonds on a white background.

Swami Rudra

Arti, or arathi, for Rudra

You are the thorn on my mountain
You are the sheep in my side
You are the fly in my ointment
You are my all to me.

You are the hair in my china shop
You are the bull in my soup
You are the needle in my haystack
You are my all to me.
You are the wind in my trousers
You are the bulge in my sail
You are the meat in my dumpling
You are my all to me
I said all.

Beyond Acceptance

Rudra used to embrace the bizarre, now he embraces the norm. He wanted to solve the problem of pain, sickness, loneliness, boredom, sadness and malaise. He employed every trick in the book to escape these; acceptance, sublimation, choiceless awareness, distraction and avoidance. He sought the help of meditation, stupefaction, hypnosis, drugs and 'spiritual guidance'. He twisted and squirmed until he had nowhere left to run. He was stopped in his tracks yet his fevered brain fought for survival. The first step was to throw out all the deadweight solutions, namely philosophies, religion and meditation. The second step was the realisation that his survival depended on a self that wanted to survive. As when the car starts to break away in a skid the best thing to do is nothing said he to himself. The third step was.............
Sometimes he kills the motor, hoists the sail and lets the wind take him. Sometimes he dons the Teflon overcoat. Sometimes his vile temper gets the better of him, sometimes he swoons with love. Rudderless he allows the meteorites of ennui. He says to himself "What a little cutter" and we fail to understand where he has gone.
Where are you Rudra (when we need you)? The cat has gone but the grin remains.

Saturday 17 March 2007

St Patrick's Day, Castletownbere

Our correspondent Mr I.P. of Kenmare reports that Rudra sang ribald rebel songs on Paddy's day till 3.00 a.m. then voted for the DUP.

He can ride two horses at once, fly on one wing and bilocate but can't operate his DVD.

Rudra's golden angel


Concerning the current debate, see posts below, Mr U.K.G of India writes;

"If you go on trying to suppress the past, trying to live in what you call the present, you will drive yourself crazy. You are trying to control something that you cannot control. It is just not possible to control thought without becoming neurotic.........

If you try to control the natural flow of the river through all these artificial means, building a dam so to speak, you will inundate and destroy the whole thing. That is why you find thoughts welling up inside you despite your efforts to control, observe and be aware of them. Once this is understood then you are never concerned whether your thoughts are there or not."

Rudra will be giving his take on this in due course. But today he is in a kind mood. That's when he is at his most dangerous.

The Symptoms of Cult (see complaints)

Rudra is a fellow traveller of cultists. He is always with them. Here he lists some of their identifying characteristics:.

Divided self.
Withdrawal from daily life.
Loosening of family bonds and responsibilities.
Belief in a more powerful and significant purpose than material, bodily and social needs.
Adherence to tradition and authority rather than personal insight.

Desire (just another desire) for self-advancement to an 'egoless' or 'surrendered' state.
Abbrogation of personal intuition and desires in the name of loosening of ego.
Worshipful attitude to 'elders' and 'masters'.
Personality cult behaviour.

Feelings of higher knowledge compared to fellow men, even a subtle sense of pity.
Spiritual careerism.
Adherence to hierarchical structures .

Secrecy required for 'advanced teachings.'
Ladder of advancement and concommitment bestowal of initiations, titles and status.
Inordinate reverence for scripture and teachings said to come from higher or enlightened sources (no proof needed).
Loss of sense of humour, loss of sense of self.
Lack of ability to continue to question.
Rootedness in one worldview to the exclusion of others or none.
Can't see outside the box.

Belief in tradition (what was) and teachings (the frozen thoughts of man).
Group bonding which automatically creates a 'them' and 'us'.
Charitable activity in the name of the group (or to 'save' others.)
Frozen views on morality and ethics.
Frozen views, period.

He has noticed many of these traits in those with no cult or religious tenets as well. Being a cultist himself however he finds it hard to see outside the box (Cult symptom number 18).

He recognises the tender glory of the uncontaminated human being but would never dream of solidifying it in thought or structure.


Several complaints have been received from indignant readers about Rudra's trenchant comments on organised religions. A typical one from Sister Perpetua of the discalced order Of The Little Widgeons of Jesus Adolescent: " How can your Mr. Rudra (if he indeed exists) say such cruel things when the core of all religions preach the brotherhood of man. Shame on him!)"

Rudra referred her to the statement of Mr. U.G.K of India who said "More people have been killed in the name of the man who said 'love your neighbour as yourself' than in all recent wars put together.

R will be issuing a bulletin on this trivial matter shortly. Meanwhile he says Frederick the Great's prayer assiduously 'O God if there is one, have mercy on my soul if I have one'.

St Patrick's Day

From Mr I.P. of Kenmare:

"Rudra sings ribald rebel songs till 3.00 a.m. on St Patricks day but votes for the DUP".

Friday 16 March 2007

Rudra's School of Business Studies

Further advice for business:

'Ensure all your employees have the same skills as you.

If you lack planning and bookkeeping skills try and find someone equally hopeless otherwise you might feel threatened.
Don't keep any records.

Cash is good receipts are bad.
Always start letters to the bank with 'Dear Pen Pal'
Always start letters to the tax office with 'off the record.'

From Ms P.D.G.of London

The cares of the world

Rudra searches in vain to differentiate between the arms industry and organised religions. They are the wealthiest corporations in the world, biggest employers and initiate or perpetuate mass slaughter, one in the name of freedom and the other in the name of Peace and Truth (but their peace and truth). Both steal the liberty of man, one his very life and the other his freedom to think for himself and often his life as well.

What does Rudra do about this? He looks neither left nor right. His massive unconcern is so pointed that it liberates the attentive student. Rudra hasn't a care in the world.


Rudra maintains that 'perfection is found within imperfection'.

Hounds of Grimaldi

Rudra's connection with the crowned heads of Europe is not just the result of social climbing (sometimes, unpleasantly, called 'brown-nosing') . His great uncle Barnaby was cousin by marriage to the late Prince Reindeer of Monaco, he of the Grimaldi dynasty. The illustration above shows two of the royal hounds; Grimaldi and Caraldo (Maldi and Fitz for short).
The 'blessed' Bognor Regis (see below), the putative patron saint of greyhounds, who briefly met Rudra at Liz Hurley's wedding drew his attention to Francis Thompson's poem 'The Hound of Heaven':

I fled Him, down the nights and down the days;
I fled Him, down the arches of the years;
I fled Him, down the labyrinthine ways
Of my own mind; and in the mist of tears
I hid from Him, and under running laughter.
Up vistaed hopes I sped;
And shot, precipitated,
Adown Titanic glooms of chasmèd fears,
From those strong Feet that followed, followed after.
But with unhurrying chase,
And unperturbèd pace,
Deliberate speed, majestic instancy,
They beat -- and a voice beat
More instant than the Feet --
"All things betray thee, who betrayest Me."

Thursday 15 March 2007

In Extremis

Rudra surpasses the bounds of common decency. He flouts all norms of humanity teaching us that almost any imaginable action or dogma can be justified by the accomodating function of mind/thought (where have we seen that before?). On the very minor end of the scale we need only listen to the words of our London correspondent Ms. P.D.G.* describing R's behaviour:

"Rudra is now in a relationship with Ruppee bare. Rudra is following his rules on relationships to the letter. He only finds Ruppee attractive when legless and is planning to marry her before sobering up.

His future plans include insulting her entire family by name; forgetting every festival if possible but, if pushed, only buying his presents from all night garages including briquettes, anti-freeze or flowers that have been tied to a railing.

Rudra will be constantly on the look out for sexual alternatives. He'll never listen but be sure to make unreasonable sexual demands involving third parties and coprophilia and call Ruppee by his previous girlfriends name."

Charming! Go Rudra Go.

From Mrs C.M. of London

'Rudra smokes dried watermellon seeds to relax. He is going to supply them too as no one else will. Being a part time solopsist he plays the guitar like Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars'.

Rudra's musical relatives

The Rudra archivist, Didier Defargo (no relation to the world cup skier), has come up with an interesting genealogical surprise.Whilst researching Rudra's visit to Dorrigo in the rain forest of New South Wales in 2005 he found that R's distant relatives had lived there almost a century back. It seems this was Rudra's raison d'etre for the trip. The Murphy family emigrated there around the beginning of the twentieth century, in fact it was a forcible emigration due to the paltry theft of a ewe.

Back to the present day! Brendan Murphy and his nephew Junior (above) are both passionate piano players (seen above with the family Bechstein, manufactured in 1893). It was their grandparents who went to Dorrigo and hence they are distant relations of Rudra.

An arcane footnote: Cecil Murphy (1931 to 1997), Brendan's father, was a ranger in the Dorrigo National Park and was awarded the AC (Companion in the general division) in 1983.

Wednesday 14 March 2007

Multiple Choice Puzzle

Rudra found a substantial sum of money on a train seat.
Did he?:
A. Burn it.
B. Give it to Harrow School.
C. Add an equal sum.
D. Other?

From Ms. C.G. of Wicklow:
'Rudra chose option E. (all of the above with a twist). He took half the money and invested it on the stock market then burnt the other half and sent it in a briefcase to Harrow School.'

Introducing 'The Blessed' Bognor Regis

We have been introduced to 'The Blessed' Bognor Regis and his dog 'The Cratur' by a Mr T.B. of Kerry who knows him well. He assures us that Bognor can be seen at all the society events and is just back from the Indian wedding of Liz Hurley where he met a rather shy man answering to the name of Rudra.

Although technically still alive 'The Blessed' Bognor Regis is the putative saint of greyhounds. His name is on the list for canonisation after his intercession resulted in a small fortune for Mrs B. of Uttoxeter. She had won ST£125,000 on the popular television game show 'Who wants to be a millionaire' after correctly answering the multiple choice question: Who was the father of Edith Piaf?
A. Igor Stravinsky
B. Bernard Manning
3. M. Gassion*
4. Antoine de St. Exuprey


After a prayer to Bognor Regis she wagered the whole sum of money on Amphetamine Boy in the 2.30 at her local racetrack resulting in a record payout for that meeting.

Dr Strange

He is strangely trapped but oddly free.

From Naxalite to Socialite.

Our hero, the soigne Rudra, is a consumate socialite mixing seemlessly with celebrities and those in high places. Despite impeccable table manners his filthy fucking tongue has led his detractors to label him a parvenu.. This unfortunate lapse once led to his arrest in Thailand for lese-majesty. He escaped jail by a whisker due to his connections to the crowned heads of Europe.


Although a Jehovah's Witness he is puzzled as to what they had for afters at The Last Supper. Whatever it was, it was past its sell-by date and led eventually to the apostles speaking in tongues. (From Mrs R.B. of West Cork)

Since wrestling with this Christian Koan he took up all the other world religions and put them down again.

His favourite cocktail, apart from the Molotov, is religion and politics with a dash of patriotism. Possessing the morals of an alley cat he is not easily shocked. Ethics become mere playthings in his aleatory nursery.

Stupified by religious texts, he found that every step he took towards purification led to contanimation.

Talk about the mystic in him!

He hears silence in thunder and thunder in a blade of grass.

A no nonsense message

Dodge City and beyond.

Rudra haunts the Last Laugh Saloon. He only ever takes Yes for an answer.

Sweet Potatoes, Kasava and High Life guitar.

Our man is the patron saint of addicts although he has never taken anything stronger than a marshmallow. On a down to earth level Rudra has been described as 'the root of all vegetables'. (Mrs G.G.of West Cork). He sings African songs in the bath and is addicted to the non sequitor.


Rudra picks at his own food but gobbles other peoples. He is a lobster in his own lunchtime. He was once so hungry that he ate his inner child.

Like a vampie

Rudra has no shadow

Rudra's business Stratagem

From our London correspondent Mrs C.M.:

Rudra says:
"Do not make a business plan. Instead rely on psychics and the advice of
relatives ensuring you only talk to the ones who have no business

Tuesday 13 March 2007


Rushka is the dyslexic half-brother of Rudra. Rather a mild mannered individual, he exhibits little of the passion of his brother nor the sharp and filthy tongue. Like Rudra he is an American vegetarian (89% of whom eat meat) and is extremely partial to Steak Tartare.

Disclaimer as to identity (or not).

All characters in this blog are fictitious and any resemblance to mythological or real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. This is relevent especially in relation to the below.

According to Adi Sankara's commentary on the Vishnu Sahasranama, Rudra means "One who makes all beings cry at the time of cosmic dissolution." Alternatively, Rudra means "One who gives speech." Rudra also means "one who drives away sorrows."

Monday 12 March 2007

Rare photo of Rudra

We have recently come into posession of this photo of Rudra believed to have been taken between January and March of 2005 at Dorrigo, NSW, Australia.